Rosanne's Lounge

In the beginning
Love is wordless
It is the touch of skin
Suckling. A cuddle in the dark.

Then love is simple
I love you mama
Means you are my world
And you are comfort and
Healing to me

In teenhood love is mercenary.
I love you ma means
Thanks for letting me
Borrow the car
Or stay out late
Or for buying those shoes
I asked for.

For a while, love is complex.
It is heady and passionate
With the new lover.
Then edged with trust and hope,
Then our own children come and
I love you is amazement and joy
Abundance of love while
I love you mum is now
Deeper and filled with new respect

At some point perhaps
I love you is bitter or painful
A holding on or a working hard
And sometimes a letting go

And I suspect
Right at the end
Holding someone’s hand
Eyes moist
That love is wordless again.

You are lying on your back in a large lounge room. There is one exit to the south-west. There is a brightly coloured play gym on the floor, shaped like a butterfly.

> lick the play gym

The play gym tastes blue. There is a rattle under the play gym.

> pick up the rattle

Done. A large azure lizard appears and attacks you.

> hit it with the rattle

The lizard retreats.

> look

You are lying on your back in a large lounge room. There is one exit to the south-west. Your mother is an enormous geek.

Your hold on the earth
is so much less tenuous now

I have sustained you with my body
amazing thought
your mouth to my breast
eyes locked with mine
filled with trust
tiny hands tracing
ancient angelic sigils
on my skin

your voice has changed
from the frail bird-like cry
of confusion and frank fear
to an outraged surprise
at banged heads, delayed feeds
and the indignity of swaddling

I don’t know why you giggle
when I put my face close to yours
close my eyes and say “boo!”
but like Pavlov’s mutt I return
repeatedly for my reward

And when, finally, you drift off
into sleep, your hands continue
to conduct vast celestial orchestras
calling new planets into being
with the flick of a wrist

We are planning on making birthdays and end-of-year about experiences more than about things, but we know that people will want to buy Harper presents. I figure I ought to have one spot to point people for things we’re after or at least brands that we think are desirable.

General guidelines:

We’re hippies… ideally, choose products that are local, hand-made or fair-trade, made with natural fibres (cotton, wood, paper, cornstarch). Reused is great! Second-hand means less landfill — but see the notes of caution below. Recycled is next best (we just found a terrific line called Green Toys that’s made from recycled milk containers and a line of books and floor puzzles from InnovativeKids that’s 98% recycled content).

Items we’d like & online stores:

• Harper currently wants a car, desperately…
• Mae fabric wall decals for Harper’s wall (want want want, especially the tree, birds and animals)
• The Baby Book
• Just about anything from EcoToys Australia
• Most of the toys from PlanToys
• The dino T-shirt from My Heart Beats Green
• Lovely clothes from the Tea Collection (especially some of the dresses and the sleepwear)
• The colourful Barbara Sansoni backpack (seen at Fairground Child)

Real world stores

In Melbourne, shops that stock eco-friendly and fair trade toys are:

• Small Dreams
• Fairground Child

Some notes of caution

If you find something you think is just adorable and it isn’t on this list, there are a few things to watch out for:

• Doug is allergic to wool, fur and feathers. This means: no felt, no woollen toys, even though they’re natural.
• We’d prefer not to expose Harper to toxic chemicals, volatile organic compounds and other fun things, even when something is second-hand. This means: choose wood and cotton first; no polyester filling or materials; ask whether the plastic toy is BPA-free; no PVC if it’s something she’ll hold or suck. Also, check “eco” toys carefully: we’ve found 100% silk items that are filled with silk, but covered in polyester and toys labelled Bamboo! in big letters that are actually 20% polyester.
• We suspect Harper is gluten- and dairy-intolerant. This means: check that the gluten-free food you buy is also dairy-free (no milk, no cream, no butter, no yoghurt).

Thank you for helping us create a loving and safe environment for our daughter.

PS: gifts to charities on her behalf are also a wonderful idea.

It’s official…

Please spread the word. The message is important!